Am I alone?

Do you do this? Please tell me I’m not the only one who gets neurotic about weighing in. Please.

Since starting this blog I’ve developed a Friday ritual. I’ll spare you the details. Let’s just leave it at I try to control the variables so that all things are equal every week. When I step on that scale, the circumstances are as humanly close to the same as the week before. Is it superstitious or good science? Or just plain old neurosis? You know what I’m talking about, right? Same time of day, shoes or no shoes (don’t we ALL take our shoes off?)…please say I’m not the only one who displays this neurotic behavior.

This morning my ritual got interrupted by a child’s doctor’s appointment (everyone is fine). I weighed in late and after I had eaten, too. I was already nervous about weighing in. My week has been stressful (you’ve been there). I’ve done considerably less stress eating than the previous AB, but I did stress eat. Heck, I even made it to bed by 10….once. However, between the stress and the PMS (see Mondays’ post) I allowed myself some cheats which made me dread the scale.

Then as I was trying to take a picture of the scale the focus wouldn’t….focus. I had to weigh myself 3 times before it worked and, no joke, every time I got on the scale the weight went up by 2/10ths of a pound. As if I wasn’t neurotic enough about weighing in.

This is the result I’m taking. I didn’t gain (but I still felt the picture needed to look as scary as it felt stepping on the scale). 

My goal for this week is simple: Be better than last week.

You know how you get going in weight loss and have some success and think, “Hey, this isn’t so hard!!” Maybe this week was a little bit of that, too. But I’m realizing more and more that this IS hard. I still look in the mirror and wonder when the me I picture in my head is going to show up looking back at me. She’s not going to show up any time soon if I keep making excuses. And I can’t give up this time. I have too much at stake.

Wish me luck.

Fill-in goooood!!!

Hello friends! Another week, and here I am again barring it all in a blog. LoL. It has been a crazy busy week, and I am ready for some normalcy…yeah right!!! I started off last week with stitches, full-schedule of “Mommy-duties” and an upcoming “Fill” in my lapband (the first one). All things in their own way were giving me a bit of anxiety, and even though my exercising was pretty spot-on, my eating wasn’t always. I did decide that I need to handle things one day at a time though. I need to live in a real world mentality..and not in a “diet-bubble”. If my kids are having something that looks great, there are ways to partake without pigging out and putting myself into a depression. My Mom gave me some awesome advice. She told me that” I can’t avoid everything, or starve myself, or else I will constantly be waiting for this to be over so I can eat.” Absolutely made sense. I need to figure out what I can do to eat sensibly, a work in progress..but I am working at it!!

The big news I have is I had my very first “Fill” with my bariatric surgeon. A fill essentially is where they numb the area around my “port” (which is under the skin, upper tummy area) then inject saline through that which tightens my band around my stomach, restricting the amount of food that can go down. Thus, the moral of the story is..more restriction, less eating because I feel full. It was not as bad as I had psyched myself up for, and my sweet husband (knowing my anxiety) had actually timed a skype call to my cell-phone, right as I was walking into the room..made my day and calmed my nerves. I am a VERY lucky girl..he is awesome. The thing I was most anxious about was getting on that scale. I had worked hard, and was really hoping the results would show in numbers. I was NOT disappointed. I was initially going to just do a “reveal” of yesterdays number..then I got on the scale this morning, and my happy dance changed my mind!! As of this morning, I am very excited to say I am down to …wait for it…. 255.4lbs. Can you hear the excited screaming, totally me, I am excited even typing it!!!! Calculating everything out I have lost a total of 73 lbs since my Soldier left. My doctor actually said, you have lost a small child. How crazy is that! I NEVER want to be the number I was before. I can’t believe I ever let it get that far, and the feeling of accomplishment, even at this point is staggering! My husband will be HOME by Thanksgiving, and I am sooo motivated to keep the ball rolling and see how much I can lose between now and then. So, I have some long-term (well..by turkey day. LOL), and short-term goals. Crossing my fingers and praying that I can keep this positive attitude and transfer that energy into weight loss. Peeling off the pounds…woohoo!!

          Short term goal (by this time next week):

          1. Only eat until I am full, leaving it on my plate is OK!

           2. exercise AT LEAST 5 times during the week!!

            3. be chasing down the 240’s!!

            Long-term (by Thanksgiving) goal:

             1. keep feeling motivated, happy hormones are GOOD!!

             2. take time for me (hair and pedicure sound GREAT!)

              3. be down to at least 235 (or BELOW!!!)

Yes, I am doing this for me. HOWEVER, a little excitement over showing off to my hubby is a definite incentive! He is my greatest support, best friend and A REASON for my doing this. To feel beautiful, for me…and for him. Almost 16 years of marriage, and he still takes my breath away..and I want to see his eyes POP when he walks into that reception center. =) Until next week ladies..keep up the hard work, we can win this fight against being fat..if we just keep going!

Timing

Rae is cruising in the Pacific with her husband and shipful of strangers. I’m sure we’ll get to hear all about it next Monday! She tried to compose a blog post before she left, but ran out of time as she got ready for her cruise. We’ll excuse her for a vacation that was planned months before I beguiled her into blogging.

As long as I’m here making excuses I figured I’d share a little something. It’s that Time of the month for me. I know I’m not the only one that craves fat and carbs (preferably sweet ones), right? And during this Time…that’s all I want. I was lurking in my pantry and tried to convince my husband we should have pre-packaged cupcakes for dinner. Luckily, he has more willpower than me (must be why he’s so skinny) and gave me the serious voice when he said, “You can’t have that.” He even helped me (ok, he did it all) get a real dinner made.

After dinner, I was back in the pantry looking for chocolate. Why is chocolate so good during this Time? Thankfully, my friend, Tami, introduced me to this delicious, healthy alternative….

Chocolate, almonds, hardly any sugar…Brilliant! Had myself a little handful and gladly left the pantry. As for the rest of the week…

Wish me luck!

good news/ bad news

I’m staring at an unopened 20 oz. caffeine free Diet Coke (CFDC). I bought it less than an hour ago. I’ve been craving a soda for two days. Don’t get me wrong. Water is wonderful. Sobe Lifewater is delish. My soymilk (lactose intolerance) makes great protein shakes. But, oh how I’ve missed my bubbly friend.  CFDC is going to sit on the pencil sharpener and watch me blog. Maybe when I’m finished I’ll be ready to decide if I should crack it open or not.

Are you a bad news or good news first kind of person? Because I’m a “gimme the bad news” kind of girl. It’s always good to finish on a positive note, right? It’s settled then.

Bad news, part one: I did not avoid sugar this week. Well, that’s not a completely true assessment. Five peanut butter M & Ms is a drastic reduction from my previous habit of eating too many to count. The morning I ate the not-worth-it donut (which made me never want another donut again) I was in a bit of an unexpected time crunch and I ate no carbs the rest of the day…and parked extra far from my classroom. While I didn’t avoid sugar altogether I did drastically reduce my intake and paid better attention to what I was putting in my mouth.

Bad news, part two: Bed by 10 pm is a pipe dream.

How about some good news?! I went to two of the three free exercises classes taught at my church (Thank you, Mandy, for making me sweat uncontrollably. You are AWESOME!) I have a friend who even motivated me to think of this morning’s class in terms of last chance workout Biggest Loser style (friend, cousin…whatever). I definitely pushed harder (and kept thinking about CFDC as a reward). I walked farther distances than I had to on campus (not just on Donut Day), and I went swimming with my kids almost every day (thank you summer for lasting so long…I think).

More good news:

That’s another 1.8 lbs down! I’ve been trying not to set weight goal deadlines for myself, but if I can keep losing at this rate I could be in the 220s by my last post of October (5 weeks away). The thought of it chokes me up. But! I don’t want to be unrealistic…just motivated. This is the beginning of the hard season for me. Treats are everywhere….

WAIT…

That reminds me! I almost forgot to tell you: At the end of one of the three tests I took this week my professor had several plates of goodies out for us to choose from when we finished. While I was taking my test I could smell the chocolate wafting over to me.  Honestly, it was kind of annoying. I wasn’t even tempted to take one as I handed him my test and walked out the door. It has never been that easy to walk away before. Do you know why I could do that? I pondered it for a few minutes and then it came to me. This blog. You. Yes, You, my reader friend. For the first time I feel like I have a real team, a real group of people who read, comment, and give me words of encouragement when they see me in real life and online. I know that if I eat that brownie it won’t be worth it and I can’t lie about it to you. I want to succeed, because you are here reading and making me want to…you make me want to try harder, to pay attention to myself, to stick to my goals. I think I used to feel like it didn’t matter if I kept my goals or not…who would know. But now…I have you. I thank you…and yet that seems so insufficient. Please keep reading. Please share your struggles. I want to reciprocate. As much as I love “Go get ’em” comments I love the ones even more when you share with me what is hard for you. I promise this is the place to come for support and motivation. And I only have You to thank. {insert hug here}

Now! This week. I’m going to start it with a CFDC. {pause} Ahhhhhhhhh! Totally worth two weeks without soda. Maybe next time I’ll make it three weeks.

Goals…

• workout lots – try to fit in a morning walk
• try another quinoa recipe (our stove is fixed – yay!)
• eat more veggies
• try harder to get to bed by 10 pm
• don’t be weak, stay away from sugar, my slips have not been worth it

Wish me luck!

p.s. have you seen the new and improved 60-year old Kirstie Alley? If not, click here. If she can do it….

Woman in the Mirror

Jumping on the scale this morning after my walk with my little man, I discovered a nice surprise. I haven’t seen this number in a very long time, and it feels pretty good. However, when I look into the mirror, I see a whole different picture. Staring at myself, I DON”T SEE CHANGE. Okay, thats a bit of a lie, I see some changes. However, the first reaction I have is not “Wow, I have lost a lot of weight”. Instead it sounds more like this, “Wow..I have a LOT of weight to lose.” It is frustrating. I am having a difficult time accepting the fact that I have made some pretty major improvements while overlooking the obvious…that I have a long way to go. I know it sounds weird, and maybe a little vain, who knows. All I know is I feel like I haven’t done enough, and I wonder…constantly, if my husband (who come home from deployment soon) will even notice. He is wonderful, and has commented multiple times how proud of me he is…I just wish I felt the same. Weightloss is so much more than just the diet and exercise. It is truly figuring out how to adjust your psyche to fit the ever changing you. I guess I have been trapped inside a fat girl’s body for so long, that I don’t know anything different. I am not skinny. I am not AS ginormous as I used to be, I am an in-between.

So here is my new goal for the next week. Oh, and BTW, I will have my first “fill” with my lapband next Tuesday..kinda excited, it should kick-start my motivation while putting more brakes on my appetite. (basically a fill is where they add saline to the actual band around my stomach, thus reducing the intake size=restriction of eating large amounts of food, getting FULL A LOT faster!) Totally hoping for awesome results!!!

1. Continue to exercise on a daily basis. I have found that I am actually ENJOYING (gasp) this. I have been alternating between my “Biggest Loser” cardio work-out (or as I say, “talking to Bob”) and going on a 5-mile walk with my little guy.

2. Try to find something to reward myself with that has nothing to do with spending $ or food. This is my crutch, I do one or the other..and I think self-esteem wise (and nicer on my budget) I need to find something that is just a “me” thing. Scrapbooking comes to mind..a very long-lost friend.

3. Weightloss goal: 5lbs. I want to see more of the 250’s …and get as far away from the 260 window as I can.

That’s it. I decided not to overwhelm myself, or even worse..set myself up for disappointment. Trying to keep things short and sweet. Manageable. The mirror-issue will work itself out in due time. I need to just keep a focus on the positive (which can be REALLY hard sometimes), and not so much the overwhelming bigger picture. My mind and body need to somehow come to an understanding that I am changing…for the better. Maybe then my eyes will allow me to see those changes in the mirror. A girl can dream. LoL. Happy Weightloss laddering my friends…. until next week.    ~Aims.

Best laid plans…

It  is hard to come to the reality that you don’t have it all together.  I am an organizer (except for my home…don’t go checking too hard around there)  I like to be helpful, especially to my family and friends.  What is hard for me is to realize that I need as much help or more.  I have been in denial for a long time.

I thought I was so helpful going to nutrition classes with my mom -even if I was officially considered obese by my doctor.  It was just a minor thing…something easy to fix.  I actually did really well for a while and then for a reason I don’t know, I just stopped trying, stopped eating right, stopped exercising and then was somehow surprised when I found myself 30 pounds heavier and no end in sight.

Then my friend, my very best friend, sent me an email that I briefly glanced at and ignored because I didn’t want to face reality that I really needed help.  I was unhappy, unhealthy, and didn’t really care.  I’ve been fighting depression for years; not the suicidal type of depression – haven’t gotten there since my teenage years, but still, I just get really down.  Recently, that has been me…down.  Down on myself for getting to where I am now, down on myself for backing off on my plans, down on myself for not keeping all the balls I’m juggling up in the air.  Just down.  I’m realizing that I just expect too much of myself.  I’m not doing anything well…school, Awana, home…all is just so-so.  I’m not happy with so-so.  I’m an over achiever.  Do it great!  Do it right!  How do you change your mentality?  I’m not sure.

When I’m down, I notice way too many things that keep me down.  6 months ago or so my husband stopped looking at me.  I’m not saying he never looks at me, I’m just saying that when I’m getting dressed or getting out of the shower, he no longer sneaks a peak or makes any kind of comment that has been typical of him for years.  It hurts me deep…mostly because it’s all my fault.  I mean, who would want to look at what I’ve let myself become this past year.  Please don’t think I’m bashing my husband.  He’s a wonderful, kind, affirming man who truly loves me.  I don’t even think he knows the change…

I have great plans to change.  I draw out a plan and then for a while I keep up, I am so organized…for a while.  Life throws me a change and then I lose my concentration and off I go…

My goal was to be down 8 lbs by the end of the month….for our cruise.  I was hoping I would fit into some of my clothes again…well, those pounds didn’t come off the same place I put them on, so my body is not cooperating with my plan.  I am now 172.5 lbs.  Started at 181.5 so I’m down 9 pounds.  I have another week before we go…and I did awesome on reaching my goals… I should be celebrating, right?!

OK, let’s see what I can do this week…maybe there’s still hope in fitting into something nicer than the 3-4 pair of shorts I wear over and over not wanting to put any more money into a size I don’t want to be wearing.  Maybe doing a little more exercise would be a good place to start, eh?!

This week I haven’t hardly exercised. At the beginning of the week, I golfed and swam but being away from home, away from the routine I’d been working on, I just didn’t plan enough to work out a change for my exercise routine.  It’s been almost a week since we’ve been back home and my routine fell completely apart. I golfed again on Sunday; a nice time with just my hubby.  I’m trying something different this time… This time, I’m trying to catch myself before I fall too far.  I’m trying.  That’s where I am today folks, trying…starting by making plans for the rest of the week.

Thanks for listening to me ramble on tonight…

Comfort foods?

This week has been hard.

Our microwave broke and during removal a piece fell and cracked the glass of our cooktop stove. Expensive replacement glass will be here in 2 weeks. No microwave. No stove. No oven (the whole thing is unplugged). As if staying away from sugar and drastically reducing my carb intake wasn’t hard enough.

Well, bring it on, because when I stepped on the scale this morning…

…I lost 2.6 lbs this week!!! {happy dance}

Let’s talk about some things that helped me make it through the week.

Before the Great Kitchen Breakdown of 2011, I did cook quinoa (pronounced keen-wa) one time. I added it to my favorite summer salad: tomatoes, cucumber, celery, garbanzo beans (or chickpeas – whatever you want to call them), drizzle of olive oil, lemon juice, crushed garlic, basil (I prefer fresh but I only had dried this week) and a sprinkle of feta to top it off.

Doesn’t that look yummy and healthy?! Go ahead use my super detailed recipe. Tweak it however you like and enjoy.

Since my blood pressure was slightly elevated when I went to talk Diabetes with my doctor he told me no artificial sweeteners. No Sugar. No artificial sugar. That means my drink choices are limited….to water (lots and lots and lots of water). But my mom’s a fan of stevia, a natural sweetener that comes from an herb, and we’ve used it in beverages before so we thought we’d try to make Kool-aid with stevia instead of sugar. It was ok. I don’t know that we got the ratio right, but I don’t think we’ll try that again. Lucky for me the good people at Sobe were way ahead of me and I found this yummy drink in the refrigerator section at my local grocery store.

Yumberry indeed! See the “0 calories” and “no artificial sweeteners”? How awesome is that?

Great week. I’m learning to change what comfort food means to me (and it’s paying off)! For this coming week I’ll be avoiding sugar…again, and really working on getting to bed by 10. A good night’s sleep is important in weight loss. I’ll be working out plenty, too.

Wish me luck.

Hitting the Wall

It was only a matter of time, really, before it happened. I had been putting so many expectations on myself, I left no room for error. So when I woke up the other day to a blustery morning, I didn’t realize that my mood was just as much on edge. I had been busting my booty for weeks on end, exercising, eating good…and then came the ugly. The funny thing is looking back at it from a new days perspective..my ugly wasn’t really so bad. In the past if I had a day where I wanted to lounge in PJ’s and not work-out..it wasn’t even a big deal. Usually it was celebrated with a bowl of ice cream or by baking some calorie-filled carb-o-licious treat.

It all went south in the early evening. It was getting late and I hadn’t grocery shopped yet (after all it was payday-eve). The kiddos were hunger stricken, so we jumped into the car and found ourselves in the drive-thru of one of three places to eat in our tiny town. I ordered for them, caved, and ordered a chicken sandwich for myself. Plain, because you know those mayo calories are soooo much worse than the bread and patty inside the wrapper. LoL. We were on our way, and I took my 99cent heart attack and ate with my family. Hours later, little ones in bed, hours of on-line Army Wife training accomplished…I realized I was hungry. My sweet daughter had made muffins for the morning so we could get out of the house on-time. Not just any muffins, the taste-temping, amazing smelling blueberry variety. I indulged in one. (only after I had eaten a bowl of almond crunch cereal.) At this point, I felt like the world BIGGEST PIG. Sad, but true. My wall was hitting me in the face, and I didn’t care (yet).  I went to bed feeling like a weight loss loser.

Fast forward to this morning, as the Mommy-schedule-Gods would have it, I was booked and would not be able to work out (again). I dreaded even looking at the direction of my scale. It taunted me with its smug little shiny screen, “stand on me…c’mon, you know you wanna find out!” And I did. I wanted to discover how much damage I had done. Of course, I was NEVER going to get on that thing FULLY CLOTHED, are you kidding me. I waited until it was my turn to shower..and gave into the scale-temptation. Not once, nope, not twice..how could that number actually be right…but THREE times. Can we say “obsessing” oh yes, we can. 264.3. Ummm….SERIOUSLY. I was relieved, sort of. I now had an extra 2 lbs to get rid of (yes, I was staring the 250’s in the face my friends), but I wasn’t going to have to visit jaba the tentmaker for my old clothes anytime soon.

I realized the moral of this tale was not about the scale…but all about me. I obsess. I over analyze. I stress. I want to see the number drop so badly, that I make myself neurotic. I realized after my “episode” that I needed to just step-away from the scale and focus on me. My best cure…oh yeah, SHOPPING!! LoL. My oldest got braces on, and we had some time before picking up the little kids..so the mall beckoned us. She had her eye on a dress for homecoming, and I had the checkbook. We were a package deal. As she lamented over which of the 7 dresses to try on and in what color..I made my way over to a long-lost friend. The denim section. I LOVE jeans. I just don’t love the way I have looked in them for the past two years. A very cute pair were calling my name, and the sales lady handed me a size I hadn’t seen in a LONG time, saying I may just be surprised. I took a size or two bigger as well and headed to the dressing room. I thought I might as well hit the disappointment first, so I tried on the smallest size first. One leg, two legs…a couple well executed jumps and OH MY HECK…I WAS IN THEM!!! They were tight, they weren’t cutting off my circulation, and I could pull them away from my thigh, so no vacuum sealing. I did a turn and oh my gosh..I had a butt. Not a caboose trailing me..a BUTT. I almost cried. All the torture of the last day or so, and I was in a dressing room in jeans MULTIPLE SIZES smaller than when my husband left. I decided to press my luck even further and tried on the clearance cardigan (in a size smaller than the jeans), and a top to go with…NOT FROM THE plus size section. I will not lie..it all came home with me. I felt good, no..I felt SEXY. I was, for one day (gasp) happy with my body, and I was not going to reward myself with this outfit (thank heavens for military discounts and great sales).

My friends, it is truly all about perspective. Mine sucks, on a general rule. I am constantly putting myself down and allowing the proverbial “walls” in life to smack me head on. This time around, I am playing it different. This blog, for one thing has given me my voice back. Allowing me to share how I am feeling, and the guts to let you all read it. I am also, a work in progress. I have my great days..and my blustery days, even some moments in between. Through it all, I work, and I try. That’s all I can do.. and gosh darn it, I am getting pretty good at it. The outfit hanging in my closet says so, so there! As my awesome pal, Walt Disney said, “Keep Moving Forward!”

Golf

Exercise is not something I’m ever really excited about. I really HATE to sweat. I’m not a glistener…I sweat! A lot! When I do my walk/jog on the treadmill, I seriously look like I wet my pants. Not something I’d really like to do at a gym. Not something I like to do at home.

I do like improvements. It is nice to see my distance in an hour improve, not to be out of breath quite as much when I’m doing my run and I especially liked that I wanted to run through the last walk mode. I really like that…But I still don’t much like to run. A lot of it has to do with having bad ankles…I’ve had numerous injuries, in fact I have metal rods and screws holding one together and the other is rubbing bone on bone. It hurts…but I’ve decided I can’t let that stop me any longer.

You know what I do like? Golfing! My husband, son, father-in-law and I went golfing today. We went on an executive course and walked it. I enjoyed the interaction, the sport of it and the time. It went by so fast! In a par 54 course, I got a 104 which means I swung the club a lot…fun exercise…and a number to try to beat next time. We have free golfing at a local course for a year. I am going to try my best to get out once a week.

I also like to ride a bike. While we were camping, we rode our bikes quite often. My gears need work, so that is now in my goal for the week…get them fixed.

For me, finding exercise I enjoy is going to be essential for me to continue.

I challenge you to try some new exercises to find out what you really enjoy and then work it into your schedule. Make it fun so it is something you look forward to instead of something you dread.

Off to the pool for a swim…something else I enjoy…

~Rae

a day late…

Good morning!

Yes, I noticed it’s Saturday. I’m a day late. Honestly (popular word around here), I wasn’t avoiding writing like I was last week. I just didn’t get any time to myself at home in front of the computer yesterday. Maybe I should tell you a few things about myself…there might be someone reading who doesn’t know stuff about me…maybe.

I have been a Stay At Home Mom for 7 years (which is way longer than I was a Working Mom). My 3 munchkins are growing much too fast for my liking. The Princess just started high school. Buddy is in 5th grade. The Legend (not the nickname I gave him – I like to call him Destructo-boy) turned 5 this year and has begun his school career in Kindergarten. It’s been an emotional month for me with my baby starting school and my girl…growing up (Princess has Taylor Swift’s song “Never Grow Up” as her ringtone for me). I love my kids.

I share those great kids with a handsome guy who does laundry. We’ve been married for 16 years and I still like to refer to him as my boyfriend…the kids hate that. {wicked grin}

Since all my kids are in school and life is what it is I decided that it is time to complete my education. This is my second semester back to school. I’m taking 13 credit hours and do most of my studying at the school library – for several reasons – not the least of which is how quiet it is there and how no one seems to interrupt me and want me to fix them a snack when I’m there. Weird.

Did I mention that I belong to 4 carpools? Yeah, life gets busy.

So I’m a day late and I wish I could say that I’m a pound short. Alas, no picture of my un-pedicured toes this week as I neither gained nor lost any weight. I’m not surprised. I got some news this week that has effected my weight loss program. Remember how last week I talked about the doctor and my knee? Well, I also went because I’ve been having really bad headaches – like my eyeballs feel like they are vibrating in my head. I knew it was a sign of something I’ve been dreading. Tuesday my doctor confirmed that I have diabetes.

Diabetes. It runs in my family. Both sides. Not fair, right? Plus, I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes in 2 of my 3 pregnancies. And I’m fat (have I mentioned?) which is a huge risk factor. So that just ups the ante for reasons/motivators to change my bad habits and increase my good ones. I am fighting quite literally now for my life. I’m 40 (ouch, that harder than telling you how much I weighed was) and I have good GREAT reasons to live.  If I work hard and lose weight I may be able to overcome the dreaded D!

Let’s talk goals. This week I did more exercise than usual. I took my dog on a long walk. I spent an evening at the pool with kids. I usually let someone else take them and do chores/relax in the peace & quiet. But I, honestly, could have done more. I’ve been tired – a side effect of untreated diabetes – and it’s been hard to get up early to walk (my best bet to get my exercise). Now that I’m medicated things should start to get better.

In addition to the medicine, I have to change how I eat. Drastically. This week is going to be tough. I REALLY have to plan ahead and I’m going to have to try some new stuff. This week my goal is to try a recipe or two for quinoa (any suggestions?) which is a high protein grain. And I will eat no sugar. None. Oh my gosh this is going to be hard.

Wish me luck.