Numbers

I don’t like numbers. I never adored math, and balancing my checkbook gives me a headache. However, the numbers I detest the most have always been those that smile up menacingly from the dreaded scale. I was never “skinny”. In high school I was the girl with ample boobs and I began to feel that no matter what the scale said, I was fat. It led to an exhausting habit of putting myself down, after all nobody likes the fat girl.

When I met my prince charming I finally felt that I had found someone who loved me for me… chunky monkey and all. I settled into a security, and I began to put on more weight, then I would lose it(but never all of it!). I was going through a constant yo-yo effect on my body. As the rhyme goes, after the love, then marriage, yes along came a baby carriage. Our sweet baby number 1, was followed by 3 more over our almost 16 years of marriage. To blame the weight on motherhood (hello..do the NUMBERS. She’s 14!) would be dishonest, I did this to me..nobody forced me to eat. What I found besides the dreaded numbers going up (which eventually led to the death of my scale) was a creeping self-consciousness and an even bigger problem: horribly low self-esteem.

A few months ago I made a decision that has changed my life, and I will gladly get into that soon. Nothing is easy, and it is a constant struggle. For now I am confronting the numbers head on…and it is CRUNCH TIME!! This picture was taken the day the love of my life deployed. It was also my jumping off point..and now there is no turning back. The Numbers will not rule my life, they are GOING DOWN!!!! So everybody hang on..it may be a bumpy ride!

Who am I?

So I get this email from my very best friend asking me what I think about blogging with her on our weight loss story…the good and the bad.  She knows me well…enough to know I don’t like to write, but she’s my very best friend so here I am…supporting our weight loss together…

So who am I?  I guess I am best defined by my roles.  I’m a busy mom to 2 kids.  Only one is at home right now and we’re homeschooling…a big job but worth it!  I am a wife to my husband of 16 years…a great man!  We run our church  Awana program together – a full-time job!  I have had a great summer break camping in our motor home here and there and even a fabulous trip to Niagara Falls.  We really enjoy eating well on the road….and at home…hmmm!

Last week, in prep for this here little blog, I got on the scale.  It had been a while since I hopped on that nasty little bugger…but I did it.  I did NOT like what I saw.  I saw a number that I’d never seen on it before…not a good surprise.  181.5!!!  This is not the kind of milestone I’m interested in celebrating but here I am celebrating.  Sometimes it takes an ugly milestone to really wake you up.   I’M AWAKE!  So now what?!

Well, goals sound like as good a place to start as any.  I’ve learned that I need mini goals and long-term goals.  My short-term goal is to work out every day this week.  Working out is defined as an hour on the treadmill, on my Wii, biking, or in the pool. I don’t have a gym membership but will be getting a 3 month membership somewhere, so another goal is to do some homework and join by this weekend.  I have a fabulous Bowflex system but we have someone staying with us, living in our home gym for an undefined amount of time.  I’ve been putting things off for long enough.

My third short-term goal is to get control of my eating this week.  This means having a dietary shake for breakfast and lunch (from my doctor), fruit or veggie snacks, yogurt and a sensible dinner with my family.  I will also  drink 8 glasses of water a day, getting 2 in before I have a Diet Coke.

Longer term, I want to lose 8 pounds by the cruise I’m going on with my husband at the end of September.  That is 2 pounds a week.  This should get me back comfortably into some of the clothes that have recently gotten a bit (ok, honesty is the rule right…very much) too snug on me…

A little longer term…by December, I would like to be down 20 pounds.  This will take serious control, but is something I really want.

My big goal… I want to be down to 130 by June of next year so I can go shopping for fun clothes for our vacation to Hawaii…starting in the garage attic where I have a few boxes of clothes I WILL fit in again.

Now, I am WAY uncomfortable sharing these goals with you but I know without sharing I will have no one to keep me to them.  So, please be my partner, encourager and even a scolder (nicely) when I need it.

Here’s to this new trek!

~Rae

Welcome

For more than a year, I have been mulling over the thought of a blog where I could vent my frustrations, share my goals, and hopefully (and maybe most importantly) be accountable to a few readers as I attempted to lose weight (again). Recently, I realized I didn’t want to do it on my own and so I invited two of my people to join me. Gladly, they agreed and with some enthusiasm.

I’m AB and yes, those freakishly long toes above belong to me. You may be thinking, “Why is the long-toed freak starting a blog  about scales?” Good question. Except this will be a blog more about our experience with scale…and with scales. All three of us are trying to lose weight. We all have different figure types, different starting weights, different goals and methods for trying to lose weight. You get three different perspectives on this popular battle and we get to support each other!

The only rule we have is: Be Honest (like the Boy Scouts). You can expect the good, the bad, the ugly (you know there will be ugly), the uplifting, the depressing, the fear, the failure, the triumphs….all of it!

So welcome! We hope you’ll keep us accountable. We hope you can relate, learn or even be inspired. Heck! We just hope you’ll  come back. (next time I’m going to do something I swore I would never do)

In the meantime, you can click on the Who’s Weighing In link below to learn a little more about us.