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No complaints

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Down two more lbs.

Been working hard and making (mostly) healthy choices.

Life is busy but I’m making time for me and that’s made all the difference.

During the semi-annual General Conference of my church this weekend this guy spoke about taking responsibility for our own physical fitness and how it relates to increasing our Spiritual self. Super awesome talk. Check it out.

It’s a tough season to avoid junk but in previous years I’ve avoided all candy during October and November. It’s an effective plan.

Go ahead and steal it.

I see it now

 

Came across this pic from 2009. It’s a rare moment where I am not the one doing all the picture taking (if I remember correctly I put the camera in my husband’s hand and said something about someday we will wish I was in a few pictures). When it came on the screen this week I understood what people have been saying¬†about me “looking good”. I usually chalk their words up to kindness and encouragement. Looking at 2009 AB besides being a little grossed out, I see the difference between then and now.
ABs pizzaThis revelation paired with my weigh in this week and I realized I’ve shed 25 pounds since this picture was taken! TWENTY-FIVE!

I CAN do this. Another 25 and I will be smaller than my kids have ever seen me in real life. I can do that by Christmas.

There it is. I’ll say aloud my next weight goal (I don’t know why that is harder than sharing my weight): lose 23 pounds by the end of December. I want to look back on pictures from this summer and be relieved by the new and improved AB.

Look for more regular blog posts! I’ll try not to be boring.

Wish me luck!

 

Starting Over… Again

I’ve heard so many inspirational quotes over the years about weight loss, starting over, succeeding, planning, failing, and all the other things that have to do with weight loss. But the bottom line is, when you don’t stick with it, when you don’t follow the plan… you start over again and again and again. And that’s what I’ve done. Again.

3 weeks ago I had my lap band taken out. It was a huge decision, one I’m still not 100% sure of. But I did it. It wasn’t serving me any good and I was having some pretty awful side effects that I won’t share with you in case you have a weak stomach. So many people have asked me if I’m planning on another surgery or what my plan is from here. Here it is: I plan to succeed. I plan to work out, to eat better, to drink my water, to get sufficient sleep, stop making excuses, and stop cheating myself. If that means I do this on my own, fabulous! If that means that I decide to have another surgery, perfect! But either way, I have the same plan.

This week I have been focusing on eating “clean”. I’ve been eating way more fruits and veggies and whole foods. I’ve been working out daily and I’ve been loading up on water. I feel GREAT! I’ve been sleeping great and have energy like none other! And I’ve lost 5.5 lbs! Motivation right there, huh?! I’ve already made a plan for tomorrow- 4th of July– I’m not setting myself up for failure. I’m planning on allowing myself a little something extra and I’m not going to make myself feel bad for it!

I feel good knowing that I’m moving forward again. After my Dad passed in February, my mom sold her house, Bryant had surgery, Bryant got a new job that is relocating us to Utah, I had surgery, my Mom had surgery, I’ve been packing our home, and taking care of 4 crazy kids. I was spread so thin. I was sinking fast. This week I’ve given myself a half hour a day to work out. It’s made all the difference in the world on my mood and my energy. I finally feel like I’m getting back to me.

Have a safe and happy 4th!

xoxo,

Autumn

Me and Taylor Swift

I weighed in and even with all of the mucus taking up residence in my head (I think my head is three pounds heavier than usual) I am down more than two and a half pounds to this…

2013-06-14 weigh in

I never, ever, ever want to see that 240 (or any weight above it) again. Ever. Serious as a Taylor Swift break up song. (Don’t you love my summer inspired blue sparkly toes?! Rae treated me to a birthday pedicure last week. She’s the best!)

I found inspiration and strength through my prayers and scripture study this week. Of course, the inspiration wasn’t all for my battle with the scale, but that clearly shows. I found that when I looked for satisfaction or fulfillment in desserts I was left wanting. It made those things less attractive. I renewed my love/hate relationship with cycling class. I hate going but love how I feel afterward…and love that I have a designated time to hang out with Tami. Sometimes we chat almost as much as we cycle but we always sweat buckets….well, I do…don’t want to speak for Tami ūüėČ

Autumn and Rae use the myfitnesspal app to track their stats. I used to use sparkpeople.com for that purpose. Now I find myself wondering which app to use. Problem is…I’m not very good at record keeping. Maybe this week I will spend a day using each and pick the one that best. I’m having a hard time motivating ¬†myself to use one at all. I find I get discouraged by my lack or by the time it takes to keep track.

Do I get easily discouraged? Or am I just a big complainer? Whatever. I blame the nasal drip and cough this morning.

Continuing the same goal for this week, plus more spin, add in some swimming, and eating my veggies. Looking forward to a great week….if I can get over this nasty summer cold.

Wish me luck!

10 Weight Loss Commandments

 

1. Though shall stay hydrated with water and not sugary or carbonated beverages.

2. Thou shall avoid food with preservatives and high salt content.

3. Thou shalt not eat past 7 pm or before 6 am.

4. Thou shalt not “give up” on a diet or “give in” to a binge¬†after¬†a minor slip up.

5. Thou shall do at least 30 minutes of exercise a day: a brisk walk is fine.

6. Thou shalt not eat at unplanned or unusual times, or when emotional.

7. Thou shall find a distraction when cold pizza or left over birthday cake is left unattended.

8. Thou shalt not be discouraged, this takes time, and quick fixes are not lasting.

9. Thou shall eat regularly, starvation diets are only temporary solutions to lifelong problems.

10. Thou shalt never feel alone; we’re in this together!

Author unknown

I saw this and thought how very appropriate it was. Particularly after such a big food holiday. A few of these were much needed reminders for me. I must say #10 hit me a little harder than the others as recently I am feeling very alone in this struggle.

Disclaimer-What I am about to say is in no way an insult to those who have chosen this course of action for weight loss. For many it is life saving! I, myself have considered it and if cost hadn’t been an issue would have had lapband.

A coworker underwent the gastric sleeve weight loss procedure 3 months ago and has lost 73lbs. As my weight has plateaued and the comments on my weight loss have waned,  hers have soared as she still eats the same, has her daily large sodas and has yet to see the inside of a gym. The comment  was made to me this week, as I stopped into the office on the way to the gym, that I should stop working so hard and do what NAME did. I could have felt defeated or angry, really I just felt alone. A second friend  who kept saying she would go to the gym with me, but when it came down to scheduling a time always bailed, is also scheduled for surgery.

I haven’t had a sweat buddy through this whole course, but I at least knew others trying along with me. I know you all are out there too, but it’s not quite the same as having a hug from another weight warrior in a weary battle when you are struggling. It seems like there is a “weight loss race” now and I am losing. Every week when **** asks me if I lost and I say no and she proceeds to tell me, “That’s too bad. I’ve lost another X lbs.” (with a smile that is a little fake)

I’m probably just being very sensitive and making and a mountain out of a mole hill. I totally meant for this post to be motivational and instead it is all gloomy. Sorry folks. Didn’t mean to take you all on the pity-train with me. Sigh!

Real life, right?!

Hi Ho Hi Ho it is off to a new start I go! Gym in the morning. A loss to report for next week would be awesome!

Good Luck everyone!

 

I HATE THE SCALE

WARNING: This post contains the rantings of a woman spurned by a scale.

I exercised hard core this week. I not only met my goal of getting three workouts in and eating lunch every day instead of snacking but I did FOUR workouts. Not only did I participate in those four workouts but I pushed myself in every single one. I swam laps for an entire hour. I could barely catch my breath between songs during spin class. Mandy had us doing so many pushups that I lost count. And other than the two Krispy Kreme donuts -which were part of my motivation to push myself harder in my exercising – I ate really well. Not only that but I think I got plenty of sleep and I know I’ve been downing water like it’s going out of style.

So why? WHY? WHY? did the scale (stupid, dagnab scale) say this to me today:

This is 1 whole pound up from last week! Not only that but I just checked pictures in my archives and this exact weight has been rather popular lately. 3 of my last 5 weigh in results were exactly 228.6!

I was looking forward to getting on the scale today. I wanted to love the results of my hard work this week. I was hoping to shout out that I’d reached a new low weight since starting this blog.

I hate the scale.

And so help me if even one of you suggests that it’s muscle weight gain from all the work I’ve been doing you will be banished from the land of scalematters forever! (I may have been watching too many season 1 episodes of Once Upon a Time lately).¬†All that muscle I’m gaining is supposed to be burning the fat away.

Clearly my body likes this particular weight.

I. Do. Not.

I can’t even say that I’m going to take drastic measures because I’m not sure which area of nutrition and exercise I need to fine tune. It feels so elusive. One thing I do (or don’t do) can make a huge difference on the scale, but what is the mysterious one thing…this week?

I’m going to pray about it.

Wish me luck.

 

 

4 Pounds………………

That’s all just 4 pounds in 2 weeks. Doable, right?!

September 30th will be the end of the quarter. The Weigh and Win program pays out according to the weight you have lost each quarter. The higher the weight loss the higher the pay out. I am 4 pounds shy of 10% which is the next tier on the pay scale. How annoying to be so close and yet so far!

How do you lose another 4 pounds when you only make it to the gym once in a week? My declaration to make the gym a priority on Monday happened and nothing else. Not because I didn’t want to go. Just not enough hours in a day.

Part of me says to be happy , I’ve lost more than 10% since starting on my journey. That’s something! The sense of accomplishment from having a recognition for doing it is something too. They say to reward yourself when you reach milestones and honestly having that monetary reward in this economy goes a long way to buying a new pair of pants. (In a smaller size!)

Harumpph!

I don’t know what to say. I have no plan. No idea how to fit things in. I just stare at my calendar and wonder how little sleep I can function on. How do you say “No” to your kids or husband so you can workout? I feel so guilty when I do. It takes away from the little bit of time I have from hubby or more time away from home when I have worked all day. With my DH in school, it isn’t very easy to ask if he will watch the kids when he has schoolwork to do. The teens have their schoolwork and activities too. I need another of me to take care of things while I get to a healthy weight. Anyone know how to clone themselves?

On another note….According to little birdie, Miss Rae will be¬†joining¬†us again on Mondays. That’s right, I am calling you out Rae. I am taking that email as a binding contract! LOL!!

I can’t wait to hear how she is doing. She’s probably had an awesome weight loss that will put us all to shame.

How do you measure success?

Being a part of this blog has helped to figure out why I do some things I do. Having to be honest about food, workouts and even posting my weight has been enlightening.

Something occurred to me this past week. I do not consider myself as being successful even when the scale is going down or my pants are falling off or lifting my preschooler has gotten much easier. No, it’s not a success until someone else notices the changes.¬†

I wait and hope for my husband to say something. Friends, family, coworkers, validation from somewhere external. Is that vain. I can’t decide. I just feel like it doesn’t matter how much I sweat if it isn’t a visible change obvious to others than I am not on the right track. I want to be doing such a good job at getting ¬†fit that people have to ask for my “secret.” Don’t we all do that? See someone who has lost a lot of weight and our first thought is, “How did they do it?” I’ve certainly asked it. It would be great for someone to ask me that.

Over the last week-week and a half I have seen friends that I haven’t seen since May or early June and I got some confirmation that I am on the right track. Hubby has been paying a little more attention to me, especially getting undressed. TMI I know but come on, you ladies know how much that can mean to us. The best was a coworker whose jaw dropped when I saw him over the weekend. I’ve gotten a new cut and color as well as not seeing him since ¬†the end of May. He told me he couldn’t stop staring when I came in. From a gay man, it was a high compliment. At least until I showed him a picture from my vacay with my hubby and he then went on about what a “hottie” my man is. Sigh! He is adorable. Hands Off he’s mine! LOL

It’s was a bit of an eye opener. I was seeing changes and the scale has been my friend(as of today I am down another 2.8lbs!) but I was still frustrated. I know why now. ¬†Shouldn’t it be enough to see the changes for ourselves?

So what’s your measurement for weight loss success? Is it more motivating when others start to notice your loss?

 

Regroup and returning to the road!

Hi all y’alls…remember me?!

It’s been a whirlwind, but a great vacation. ¬†My son, mom and dad drove from coast to coast and back again the last 3 weeks. ¬†We were able to witness so many beautiful, awe inspiring, God blessed places. ¬†He truly is a creative Creator…seriously! We saw family all over the US too. ¬†It was a fabulous trip.

I started out my journey at 175…yikes! ¬†In all the craziness of Awana ending, school ending and vacation planning, I ate way too much this and that and didn’t watch things too well. ¬†I’m happy to report that my weigh in this morning was below my “stuck” point of 170 and a good deal below my “trip” weight – I’m actually 168 right now…after 3 weeks of traveling! ¬†I’m thrilled! ¬†Seriously! ¬†I was able to say no to many of the treats handed my direction and when I did partake, I only had a bite or two…sometimes 3, but I was careful to not overindulge – not to go crazy. ¬†It paid off…even though I’m sad to say I had little opportunity for exercise, I didn’t allow that to be an excuse for letting things go.

Hubby and I quickly cleaned the RV and I’m heading out again…this time to spend almost a whole week with my best friend since high school…ABC and her family. ¬†My hubs will be joining me on Tues, so I’ll be missing him again tonight. ¬†Since we will be static – not trekking from place to place, I’m a little concerned that snacking will creep in, but I’m resolved to making wise choices and getting the exercise I have been needing…and working on a good base tan for the Hawaii trip coming in a couple weeks…not much sun makes it into an RV, and let me tell you, some of the places we traveled through were blazing hot so we hid in that RV as much as possible. ¬†I love my CA weather!

I’m excited to report good news since the last few posts I’ve been rather frustrated with myself. ¬†I’m patting my back this time…excuse me for the mild bragging. ¬†See you on the road!

Out of the ashes a phoenix rises.

Hellllloooooo?! Are you out there?

Bueller?                    Bueller?                 Bueller?

We have been missing some fellow weight warriors. I think I can safely say AB and I miss you. I miss hearing your updates, even if they are not glowing. It so helps to hear others struggle too. We are here for each other in the good, bad, skinny and the more-of-you-to-love times.

Drop a line, let us know how you are doing. Please?

It’s been a roller coaster of a week. Little did I know last week just how bad things would get around here. ¬†It’s been like a movie watching the fire¬†destruction. As word would come of someone we knew being evacuated or that theirs was one of the homes destroyed, it has made us thankful. Every¬†morning¬†we wake up and hope to look out the window and not see the plumes of smoke and every night as clouds gather we pray for rain and hold our breath when we see the lightning that it won’t light another fire.

I am sooooo sick of the heat as well! I’d go back to Arizona if I liked it this hot all the time. It’s making it very hard to want to do a run outside. I think I would just sweat away to nothing. Wait, isn’t that what I want? I could just melt away to my goal weight. LOL! Too bad I can’t stand the thought of that much sweat. I wish I just “glistened.” No, it’s stuck pig sweat gross.

Anyway…….Can you say “SQUIRREL?”

Ok progress report. So this week was the end of the quarter. The Weigh and Win ¬†program goes by quarters and you have until the end of each to lose a certain amount of weight to win money. The first cash tier is at 5% weight loss. The higher the percentage the higher the prize money. I didn’t get it the first quarter. I wasn’t getting anywhere significant on weight loss until the last 5 weeks as those of you following along know. After my last weigh in though, it was actually obtainable. From 228.2, I just needed a good 1/2 pound loss to secure the 5%. That’s doable, right?! I could do that, come on!

I worked out, even turned up the levels. Was pretty good with food. When I weighed in Thursday I totally expected to have that 1/2 pound knocked out. 229! What! That’s not right! The number is supposed to go down not up! I now needed more than 1/2 a pound and only until Saturday to do it. The doubts crept in. The voices whispered. I wasn’t going to hit that 5%. I was perturbed. I was not going to get this close and not make it!

I sweated and worked and had stiff, sore muscles. I had thoughts of fasting on Friday to hit the mark on Saturday. I didn’t. I even cheated with a 100 calorie ice cream bar. I wasn’t going to have a false weight. I was either going to hit the mark or not and hopefully be ok with whatever. I knew I would be mad if it didn’t go my way, but I had made up my mind that I wouldn’t let it stop or slow me down. It would just be a hiccup.

I weighed in on Saturday with hubby waiting outside the kiosk. I came out¬†suppressing¬†a fist pump with a big ole “YES!” There were other people around after all. He could see on my face the results though. Take that 1/2 pound! 5.26%!! 226.8lbs!!!

Now begins a new quarter. The next cash prize is at 10%. Of course 15% is even more money! Momma needs a new pair of shoes! Not really, but some new workout clothes would be nice. My pants are getting a little too loose!

I hope we all have a good week on and off the scale!

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