Small victories

I went to the market today. My favorite carbonated beverage was on sale. It’s a healthier option than other sodas so every once in a while I indulge (which is a stark difference than a few years ago when I drank more soda than water). Last time I brought it home I drank one can a day for almost 2 weeks. Self restraint?

Maybe. But! I didn’t lose any weight in that time frame.

Today I walked past My Soda three times and each time I almost talked myself into buying it.

Almost.

Thankfully, I overcame my “natural (wo)man”, reminded myself that I need every little help I can get in shedding this weight, and did not put them in my cart.

I’m sodaless.

Now it’s 9:45 and I am seriously in my bed. What is happening? Why all the willpower? Quick someone bring me a pint of New York Super Fudge Chunk and we’ll find out just how strong I can be.

Never mind.

I’m too sleepy to get a spoon.

Sleep tight. Wish me luck (and more of this super power as the days go by)!

Thief

I stole this from a blog I discovered today because I thought it very fitting….and because I need this reminder all the time!

Happy hump day, friends!

Starting Over… Again

I’ve heard so many inspirational quotes over the years about weight loss, starting over, succeeding, planning, failing, and all the other things that have to do with weight loss. But the bottom line is, when you don’t stick with it, when you don’t follow the plan… you start over again and again and again. And that’s what I’ve done. Again.

3 weeks ago I had my lap band taken out. It was a huge decision, one I’m still not 100% sure of. But I did it. It wasn’t serving me any good and I was having some pretty awful side effects that I won’t share with you in case you have a weak stomach. So many people have asked me if I’m planning on another surgery or what my plan is from here. Here it is: I plan to succeed. I plan to work out, to eat better, to drink my water, to get sufficient sleep, stop making excuses, and stop cheating myself. If that means I do this on my own, fabulous! If that means that I decide to have another surgery, perfect! But either way, I have the same plan.

This week I have been focusing on eating “clean”. I’ve been eating way more fruits and veggies and whole foods. I’ve been working out daily and I’ve been loading up on water. I feel GREAT! I’ve been sleeping great and have energy like none other! And I’ve lost 5.5 lbs! Motivation right there, huh?! I’ve already made a plan for tomorrow- 4th of July– I’m not setting myself up for failure. I’m planning on allowing myself a little something extra and I’m not going to make myself feel bad for it!

I feel good knowing that I’m moving forward again. After my Dad passed in February, my mom sold her house, Bryant had surgery, Bryant got a new job that is relocating us to Utah, I had surgery, my Mom had surgery, I’ve been packing our home, and taking care of 4 crazy kids. I was spread so thin. I was sinking fast. This week I’ve given myself a half hour a day to work out. It’s made all the difference in the world on my mood and my energy. I finally feel like I’m getting back to me.

Have a safe and happy 4th!

xoxo,

Autumn

I’m ticked

That is half a pound heavier than last week and I have been working hard! I hate weeks like this!

Instead of my normal, “Nothing I do matters anyway!” pout fest (that usually means I skip workouts and eat all sorts of things I’ve been avoiding) I am trying to double down. No skipping workouts and no sugar.

I type that reluctantly. I am weak. I only decided it this morning after my weigh in to avoid sugar and I’ve already come close to grabbing sugary treats. Can I stay away from sugar?

I can stay away from candy, soda, and other sugar-filled treats (which is where I usually find comfort in my disappointment). I can. Right? I mean, YES, I can.

Wish me luck (and better results at my next weigh in)!

Hide It….and stick to it!

Sorry I missed yesterday, I was crazy. I’m not even sure where the entire day went, but before I knew it it was 12:17 am and I was climbing into bed!

Last weekend I had a birthday party to attend. Before I went to the party I decided I was going to work out to hopefully curb the urge to make not so good choices.  At the party  they served chips, pizza, and an amazing looking cake. I sat and sipped on my water and did not indulge on the “devil food” lol. When it was time for the cake I took one bite of my son’s slice and that was it. One bite! I was so proud of myself!! I felt like that was a huge accomplishment. The next morning I got up and did my usual morning routine (bathroom, nurse, bathroom, weigh) and I had GAINED?! What in the world?! I was so so so pissed off discouraged! I had been working so hard! I have been logging my food, exercising, doing everything I needed to and I GAINED?! How could this be? I came out in tears. Yes, tears. I told my husband how frustrated I was and that I didn’t understand. To which he replied, “you’ve got to stop weighing every day. You know your weight fluctuates. You have to stop”. He was right and I knew it. So I gave him the scale and told him to hide it and under no circumstances was he to give it back to me until Thursday.

I worked hard this week. Hard. I logged my food (find me on myfitnesspal mrsebg), stayed under my calories most days, exercised, and drank gallons of water. On Tuesday I had a good convo with my surgeon I worked for and who gave me my lapband (gotta love knowing I can call the man morning, noon, or night and he would picke up…it’s pay back for all the times he called me on my cell those same hours! 😉 ). I told him I thought I was going to come in for a fill soon but I was very nervous my milk supply would suffer because of it. You see, as much as I want to lose this baby weight and some, it is more important to me that my baby is breast fed her first year. My health is important because the nutrients I take in are feeding her. So after asking me how many calories I was consuming, how much water I was drinking, and how often I was working out he told me something I was a little shocked at. “Autumn, you’re not coming in for a fill. You want to nurse the first year? Your baby is 12 weeks old. I’ll see you in about 10 months if you still need one. You don’t worry about the weight. It will come off if you stick to what you’re doing. But don’t mess with a fill, you don’t want it to mess with your supply” If I stick to what I’m doing. Stick. To. What. I’m Doing. I can do that!!!

So, Thursday morning I wake up and do my routine and step on the scale. I closed my eyes and then looked….down 4lbs!!!!!! I was so happy!!! All that sweat and passing of good food paid off!!! All that going to bed hungry unsatisfied was worth it!!!

This week I’m going to face some challenges. The hubs is away on business and my cousin is getting married! So… Thursday is her shower at Old Spaghetti Factory, Friday is her rehearsal dinner at my house, and Saturday is her wedding. But I can make good choices knowing what I have to face and having it planned out.

My challenge to everyone this week is to hide your scale and stick to what you’re doing!!!

Ohhh… and here’s my favorite dessert recipe that I’ve been loving for a cold treat that’s not so bad on calories!

1 frozen banana

1tsp coco powder

1tsp peanut butter

splash of milk

combine all ingredients in your blender (I have a nutribullet so it crushes through those frozen bananas like no ones business—however if you don’t you can leave the bananas out to soften for about 10 min.) and enjoy! This yummy treat is 212 cals for 1 cup of yummy ice cream deliciousness! 🙂

 

Have a great week!

xoxo,

Autumn

Nike+ kinect training

The weekly reporting of nothing to report really started to mess with my head. But months and months of not writing on here makes me feel guilty. Not that there is still anything to report, but I like to think that my posting gives some support. At least to my other blogger authors, if not to the readers.

Ok so honesty time. I’ve been working out four times a week for about a half hour doing Nike kinect training. Yes, we are a very technological home. And yet these workouts kick my trash. This is not your wii exercising, or even the other kinect fitness games that are out there. Trust me we have tried out a few workout “games”. This is no game.

They assess your abilities by asking you to do several exercises and then you choose a goal and they put together workouts for you. I chose “get lean” as my goal; they also have “get strong” and “get toned” as goals. From here you get to tell it how many times a week you will workout and what days. I did four: Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday. You can do more or less. No judgement from the game they just put you to work.

I do two kinds of workouts, cardio and strength. High knees, mountain climbers, burpees, star jumps, sumo squats, planks, wood chops, lunges, and one and a half squats have become so well known my three year old can do them by name. I started this workout knowing that I wouldn’t weigh in anymore. I want to be healthier not just skinnier. Thing is after four months now I am a little scared I will weigh in and the scale won’t be any different. I dreamt last night that I weigh in at more. I don’t want to be discouraged again. This workout routine is working for me. So I am afraid the scale matters a little too much for me. I won’t be weighing in anytime soon and thus will have nothing to report. So, I am afraid I won’t be blogging every week. I do read every post on here though.

Keep going scale matters bloggers!

Work In Progress

This last week has been fabulous. Stressful, but fabulous. Sunday we blessed our sweet baby girl and had a ton of our close family and friends over for brunch after. I’m not so good at having people over. I’m a total stress case! I couldn’t have had done it without so many amazing people and their support. My very best friends were there doing anything and everything I needed, all I had to do was ask. It really got me thinking about the people in my life and how I couldn’t have accomplished all that I have had I not had that amazing support. When I first began my weight loss journey I didn’t tell anyone that I was going to be having lap band surgery. My parents knew and Bry knew. That was it. A few weeks before my surgery was scheduled I realized I didn’t have anyone to help me with my kids. So I went to my best friend and told her everything. She was so supportive and wonderful to come out from California where she lived at the time and came and took care of me and my kids for a week. Her amazing support was what gave me the courage to tell everyone what I was doing. The support was incredible. It still is.
I guess that’s why I keep coming back here each week. For the support. Maybe I don’t get comments, or people who read this, but I know that it helps me. I can come and look back at how far I’ve come. I can see how my fellow bloggers are doing.

This week I’ve focused on “Clean eating”. My hubs and I bought a nurtibullet and I’ve been juicing the crap out of every fruit or veggie known to man. This morning my breakfast was a smoothie that had greek yogurt, avocado, spinach, banana, black berries, strawberry, and chia seeds in it. It was amazing!! And I’m down another 2.2 lbs!!!

I wanted to put a pic up to show where I came from, where I was at my thinnest and where I”m at now. I’m a work in progress. I know one day I will get back to looking like that middle pic. The pic I can remember looking at and thinking how fat I looked…. anyway… The far left was me in November 2008, 2 mo before my surgery. The middle is me Oct 2009, 8 months and 110lbs down from my largest weight. The far right is me Sunday 2 months after delivering my baby. Down 40 something pounds from the 60 I gained with her, but still up almost 50 from my lowest. I’ll get there. Like I said, I’m a work in progress

I hope you all have a good week!

xoxo,

Autumn

Getting Back in the Game!

ok, if you aren’t my friend on facebook {which, why aren’t we fb friends?} then I will quickly update you! March 13 my world changed forever. I had my beautiful baby girl delivered by c-section {not my choice, but something about a big headed child and a pelvis that isn’t much bigger that prevents natural birth}. Liberty Grace Lynn was born at 10:32pm weighing 7lbs 13oz and was 19 3/4″ long. She is beautiful and you can read more about her at http://www.growingthegang.com

so that’s me and all my stomach glory at 37 weeks {2 weeks before having Libby}. Incase this picture doesn’t tell you I gained nearly 60lbs with my pregnancy. yes. That’s correct, I gained a small child…and we aren’t talking this little one fighting her sleep right here. I did find out that I had an abnormal amount of amniotic fluid {they got extra towels and blankets in the OR to “catch the flood”}…not 60lbs worth, but it was a lot. So, here I am 4 weeks and 5 days after having Libby and I’m down almost 40lbs. Yes, that’s fantastic, but I know it’s not at all where I want to be. In fact, I would love to be down 40lbs. Here’s my plan of attack…

As a nursing mom I’m hungry pretty much all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. But it’s not like when I was pregnant, cause then I WANTED to eat but now I NEED to eat. It’s very odd. But my food choices are very poor. I got into a very bad habit when I was pregnant to eat whatever I wanted. I went for 6 weeks without gaining an ounce and so I thought I was doing just fine. Nope, I wasn’t. Bad choices stick. Which, reminds me of something I saw on Instagram… it was a picture of broccoli that said “Broccoli sticks to your teeth but french fries stick to your A**” funny, right?! Ok, so, better food choices are a MUST!

Now that I’m 6 days away from my 6 week check up I need to prepare myself for adding physical exercise into my routine. You’d think all this bouncing, rocking, and floor walking I do with this little one would count. But I looked on My Fitness Pal, and it totally doesn’t count.

ok, my ADD is getting the best of me and Libby is seriously fighting her sleep so… I’m going to call it a night. I needed to get this out there so I can be held accountable. I’ve truly missed blogging and being crazy obsessed with my weight—though I’m sure this cute as a button little girl will be a bigger crazy obsession! 🙂

xoxo,

Autumn

Not What I Weigh!

I don’t know about you, but I pretty much have a love/hate relationship with my bathroom scale. I stand on it and those numbers just don’t give me the affirmation and admiration that I’m looking for.

So, here’s what I need to remember… if I step on that scale and see it as an indication of my worth, I’m always going to feel drained. But if I step on a scale and I look at it with the tool in mind that it was supposed to be, I can be refreshed. I can say this scale measures the weight of my physical body, yes, but it can never measure my worth as a woman.

Lisa Terkeurst

 

I was needing this today, this week, this month, THIS YEAR! 

I have a feeling I am not the only one.

Remember where your worth comes from ladies!

Just the facts maam

Weight- 221.2

Workouts- 3

Nutrition- Eh

23 weeks until Big Dog Brag Mud Run

10 weeks until Half Marathon Run to the Shrine

9 weeks until Glow Run 5k

I better get my butt in gear!

“Tears will get you sympathy. Sweat will get you results!”