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I love the show “Storage Wars”, not sure why, its a guilty pleasure I guess. There is a guy on there, super annoying, but smart at the same time. When he bids he has this long drawn out, “Yeeeep” It cracks me up. It also is kinda how I am feeling lately, Just a “Yeeeep.” on life. Long. Drawn-out. Nothing fancy or over-rated. I am just here. Life has not been sunshine and daisies for me lately, so I am not going to pretend that it is here either.

 It’s tough. I am struggling. I don’t know what I expect when I eat ok, exercise rarely, and then just saunter my way through the mix of everything else. It’s actually obnoxious, but getting on the scale is like an annoying..”Yeeep” in my head. Nothing has moved very far either way. My husband reacted with a , “You’re maintaining, that’s good.” Ummm…is it? I don’t think so. I am stagnant and bored and need to change it all up. I want to change it up. I think I can change it up. So, yesterday was GORGEOUS here in dorothy-ville. Allan had a dental appointment that I would need to drive him to and from because the meds would be a bit much for driving. So, I got this wild streak and thought ..hey, I’m gonna (wait for it) WALK today. Careful, the jaw dropping that far can be harmful. I KNOW, it is an epiphany, but I actually got out and walked the 2.5 mile path around the Custer Hill Golf course on post. There is a butt-kicking hill midway through that I basically told myself was punishment for being lazy. Not to let the fat-girl mentality push back…I decided one lap around wasn’t enough…let’s do TWO!!! You know what, I survived. I may not feel bright and cheery this morning, and my legs are a bit achy…but I did the flippin’ thing. TWICE even. How ’bout them apples.

So I have decided when the fat girl mental game starts coming into play, I need to check myself and have a way to push back. If I am ever going to get to my goal is what HAS TO happen. No more games and silliness, or even more so..excuses. So, in a nut shell. I am no longer going to “maintain”. I want to push back and make the fat girl disappear…along with all the mental games and baggage she brings along with her. Wish me luck..I amy really need it. LOL.


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