The beginning “new fruit”

My family life has been crazier than ever, and to top it all off the flu attacked my home.  YUCK!! is what my response is to that.  Most people experience the flu and come out on the other side a few pounds lighter, I would call this the “upside” to the illness;  Me on the other hand, I have the great experience of the illness and come out on the other end heavier.  What is that all about??  3 pounds, 3 POUNDS!!  Well, I will have to work extra hard to take them back off.  After enjoying the story of Amy feeling so beautiful this week, I was inspired to think about myself and ponder over the last time I really felt beautiful.  Good thing I have a great memory, or I may have been in trouble.   Unfortunately I had to go back quite far.  I remember the day like it was yesterday even though it was over 19 years ago.  Yes, that is a long time to go in life feeling “less” than par, and not in comparison to any other, just in comparison to myself.

I do not look in the mirror;  When I need the reflection for any specific reason, I just glance at what it is I need.  I have avoided the front side of the camera at all costs, and realized that I have “deleted” myself from my life.   I took a moment to actually look in the mirror today, and what I saw was a sad, fat, old, wrinkled stranger.  The surprise of what was looking back at me made me sad and desperate.  That is where I am now….sad and desperate.  How did I let myself get to this place, and how do I get out?

Now, I am reminded regularly that feelings can often times be liars, and when they start to remind me that I am “less” than I really am, I should argue my point.  But, lately, I have been pondering the real definition of beauty, and realize that I can use a little diet and fitness for my spiritual beauty as well.   The reason I am sad is not because I am fat and unfit, it is because I need to feast a bit on the “fruit of the spirit”.  I am not giving up on my physical being, I am just going to enhance that with building up my spiritual being.  My God is amazing, and I know, through Him, I can do anything.

This week I plan to work on Self-Control.  I will drink 8 glasses of water per day; I will exercise a minimum of 30 minutes per day; I will not eat after 7:00 pm; And I will spend a minimum of 30 minutes a day dedicated to studying Gods word.

Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.

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Posted on January 17, 2012, in Jenn, Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. I LOVE IT! We started the goal of daily reading scriptures together as family last January. We’ve had some hiccups, but overall we’ve been pretty consistent. Then I decided I needed to do studying on my own, too. When I do it best is when I wake up before my kids and read in my room. I know the Lord helps me in all areas of my life when I “feast upon His word”. I know because instead of stopping in for a delicious pastry after dropping the kids off (because that little devil was on my shoulder and whispering in my ear), I just drove home, filled a glass of water, and grabbed my scriptures.

  2. You don’t have to add too many pounds to feel un-beautiful. It sneaks up on you and then traps you. Sounds like someone else I know. The Fruit is one area I diet from too frequently. Isn’t it interesting that we have troubles with our food “diet” but can easily “diet” from the Word. I too have been working on that area and it does change your perspective. I truly see beauty in you and hope you recognize it soon. I love you!

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